la la la la

emo-dysfunctional kid. at its best again.

tsk.

friends and benefits

friends and benefits.. fubu’s.. open relationships..

are people not contented with something real? tsk..

no offense, but i really found people who are into these kinds of relations, pathetico. GET REAL GUYS! (and girls!) Life is too short to waste on something useless as these.

i know life is not a fairytale, that at the end of the night, your prince, a knight in shining (or rusty!) armor, would come up to you to kiss you goodnight.. no beautiful dames to wait for you by the door, and treat you as a king. there’s no such thing as the perfect one. boo hoo. deal with it.

just take note, that no one’s perfect, until you really fall in love with them.

unconditional love. period.

… and not just some one night stands or sex relations on a timely basis. TSK. please!

chances

my present makes me think about something that i let slipped in the past..

and a difficult trial faces me with “???” on its eyes..

its not just a matter of having a chance of another great love or a chance of putting away my fear behind of not being alone. because it is.. but i think its also a choice between letting a past mistake scare me of taking another risk or taking it and do the right thing this time?

my friend says “just do what’s best for you..” and another says, “if it’s what makes you happy, make that risk.”

it’s definitely a hard test, and i don’t want to fail. the test, myself, and the other person.

but i still find myself lucky, im an optimist y’know, (which i think always bring me to the safe side), that Life has given me chances.. and i have a “choice”. others would only have chances.. just chances. yet i found another question on the floor, does the other side of the door ready to take that chance with me? would it let me do things right this time?.. i hope so.

missing the point

“another guy? damn.. for the “nth” time you’ve been missin a lot of your pasts.. well, i assumed again.. =D” - calvin

it’s not wrong to miss someone.. hinde ba? you miss them, because you remember them, their silly ways of making you smile, unkind remarks about you just because they mean good, and little details na sila lang ang meron and that makes them different from your other friends. you miss something in them that makes them very special for you.

iba yung dati sa ngayon, iba yung pagkamiss ko sa kanya nun kesa sa ngayon. we are good friends, and that’s all to it.

jazz asked me if im missing this guy or any of my ex’s.. i said no. although i do miss the thought of having someone by my side always.. siguro i’m still inlove with the thought that someone loves and cares for me. ako at ako lang ang babae para sa kanya. pero no particular person. and im sure of that.

there are times that i really dont think of them, but out of nowhere, things related to them or just anything will pop out and remind me of them. nakakamiss. this is where we used to go, we watched that together, he loves talking about that, blah blah blah.. all those stuff. gets? di sinasadya pero right infront of your face, it says “hello grace, think of me naman.” minsan, kung hinde pa banggitin ng isang tao sakin pangalan nya, none of them would cross my mind.

but as i think now, even with all those ugly endings we had, emotional moments together, as much as i want to refute the memories i have with them from my mind, they will always be a part of my life.. thankful, because i am what you and other people knew of me, dahil na din sa kanila.

i got hurt, i learned, and im better.

overtime

“Telling the truth and making someone cry is better than telling a lie and making someone smile.”

09.28.06 -11:13pm

if i had not done anything as stupid as telling the truth months ago, and instead keep things for myself.. what else could i be doing tonight? weather is definitely not under my control or of anybody’s.. *damn*

rainy nights really makes you reflect on how messed up your life is.. and for the case of a very frightful storm tonight.. it sums up one thing: grace, fucked up buong mundo mo.

live life with no regrets, a friend once told me.. another text message goes, “saying you are sorry for whatever wrong you have done is the same thing as saying sorry for being who you are..” it is true, i guess, for one thing, you may have done it because it’s what you really wanted in the first place.. and the second thing, your words (or actions, for that matter) , however wrong, defines the human in you.

it’s not raining hard anymore, even the strong winds have died down.. still no electricity across town, and my phone’s battery have totally drained itself to peace.. but my mind continues to wander off to “what if’s” and “could have been’s”.. my soul thirsting for some profound sanity in life and my bruised (but whole) heart yearning for something true and an endless fate.

life is never a journey alone.. and i envy those who can describe and show how good love can be.. for all of you, readers and friends, who find themselves happily and contented to be in love, let me extend my praises for being where you are right now and not here, like me and many others, sitting or lying on their beds, waiting for someone to snuggle up by their sides..

love has always been patient.. but for MAN, oh Lord, why can’t we all just learn to wait?!

wait until the storm passed..

wait until that damn electricity starts back up..

wait until the sun shows up and smile on us tomorrow..

and wait.. wait until the perfect person for us crosses our path..

the ONE who will never leave.

all we got to do is WAIT.